ofscots: (tears stream down your face)
[personal profile] ofscots
 It's all a bit of a haze, honestly, after she finds out. She doesn't really remember checking to make sure her memory of the Queen's execution site is correct. Doesn't really remember figuring out the best way to get there. Doesn't really remember packing her small backpack or buying the ticket or getting on the train. 
 
All she remembers is standing in the ruins of Fotheringay Castle before the plaque dedicated to the death of Mary, Queen of Scots for the first time and feeling like the world was about to give out under her feet. It was only the small handful of other tourists that kept her from falling to her knees from the emotion that overwhelmed her.

She shouldn't have gone back, after that. It wasn't exactly like it helped. But something pulled her to the site in the same way she'd been pulled to France, so she'd kept coming. 

She hadn't expected to be followed here. Hadn't expected that anyone would know to come here when she'd barely known what she was doing herself.

Still, she recognizes the young man who comes to stand beside her as she gazes, a little glassily, at the plaque. As the familiar figure settles beside her, she cuts off anything he might say with the quiet murmur that escapes her lips, "I died here."

Date: 2014-06-17 03:34 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (logical phallicies)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
She wasn't supposed to find out. No one else was supposed to find out, yes, but more than anyone, she wasn't supposed to find out.

Moira Scott is one of the strongest people he knows, but she didn't need this.

But he couldn't keep her safe from it. The entire way to Fotheringay (of course that's where she went; she'd have been stopped trying to get out of the country) it's all he can think of--he hadn't kept her safe from it.

He doesn't know what number of cigarette is tossed aside as he finds himself, finally, standing beside her. His jaw stays tight for a moment before he can form a response.

"/No. You didn't. You can't start thinking that./"

Date: 2014-06-17 05:40 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (future world conquerers)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/Don't make anything of it./"

It's a desperate sort of gambit, maybe, but it's one he has to make. His fingers twitch but manage not to reach out for her hand.

"/You're still you. This doesn't change who we are./"

Date: 2014-06-17 10:28 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (justification comes)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
His breath comes sharp. The jerk of his body as he turns to her properly. He doesn't remember the last time his features had been so completely honest.

He doesn't know when he's ever been so scared of losing something. Someone.

"/Does it change us?/"

Date: 2014-06-18 02:41 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (you made me do this)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
It is a good sign. It's got to be. He can't allow it to be anything else.

"/The first I got punched in the face, my pulse./" It's difficult, dragging up memories of a place he pretends doesn't exist. For her, for this, it's impossible not to. "/The first time I got punched in the face, my nose wouldn't stop bleeding. That happened. And you were there. You kept getting me tissues until it stopped. That was you. That happened."

He's got to cling to it. He wants her to cling to it with him.

Date: 2014-06-18 10:28 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (justification comes)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/You're Moira Scott./"

And that fact still means the world to him. It's obvious from his entirely easy, entirely open body, voice; eyes.

"/You're-- the girl who saved me. You're the girl who got out. You're the girl who stills know how to laugh. My pulse, you're-- you're the only person in the world I trust./"

Date: 2014-06-18 04:31 pm (UTC)
sogreataname: (you made me do this)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/You shouldn't have had to know./" And there's briefly a crack of anger in his voice for the fact life hadn't gone according to that plan. "/You shouldn't have had to-- worry about this. And I'm-- I'm sorry./"

He used to be able to protect her so much better.

"/Don't let it win now, my pulse./"

Date: 2014-06-19 01:30 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (logical phallicies)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
It's better when he can hold her. She feels like herself again, warm and actually pliant against him.

"/Breathe with me now, mm?/"

To get through the rage. The hurt.

Date: 2014-06-19 07:44 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (future world conquerers)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/Give me the bottle, okay?/"

It's easy to make it sound, just slightly, like it's for the way it's pressed against his spine.

Date: 2014-06-20 02:09 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (justification comes)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
He presses a firm kiss to her cheek as he takes it. The arm not holding it curls all the tighter around her to keep her close.

"/Thank you./" There's genuine relief for a moment before the weight of things settles over him again. "/It's going to be okay, my pulse. It really is./"

Date: 2014-06-20 04:20 pm (UTC)
sogreataname: (logical phallicies)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/I absolutely promise./" His head shifts, nose nudging affectionately against her temple. "/We're going to-- pay our respects here, mm, and then we're going to go back home. And we're going to-- find a way to be okay./"

Date: 2014-06-22 07:11 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (you made me do this)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/What, then? We stay here?/"

For anyone else, it wouldn't be a 'we.' For anyone else, though, he also probably wouldn't be here at all.

Date: 2014-06-22 11:21 am (UTC)
sogreataname: (logical phallicies)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
At least she's willing to go, even if grudgingly. At least she's still willing to be part of a 'we.'

"/We'll take our time. I promise./"

Date: 2014-06-27 03:45 pm (UTC)
sogreataname: (justification comes)
From: [personal profile] sogreataname
"/I still know you,/ Moira Scott." It's important to murmur against her shoulder now, arm tight and certain around her. "/I still love you more than life itself. And we're going to be all right again./"

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Moira Scott | Mary, Queen of Scots

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